Chinese Cuisine Fan Gifts

"'Slow and steady wins the race.' What's yours say?"

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

'My fortune cookie says, 'invest in cnooc oil of China, and you'll be rewarded.'

'Misfortune Cookies: A piano will fall on your motorcycle in the near future.'

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"I've learned something about you tonight, Alan. You say 'chowmein' when you mean 'lomein'."

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

Lottery - come back to eat here 20 times and you will win million dollar in lottery.

'Only his closest associates are allowed to call him Peking'

'My fortune says 'you can't be too thin, or too rich, or have too much computer memory'.'

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

'It says I forgot my wallet.'

"Now...this piece of paper will reveal even more."

'All the rice you can eat... with one chopstick.'

'Do you have any wine from the Ming dynasty?'

Chinese Novel Cookie

"I like the Businessman's Special. The fortune cookies all have stock futures in them."

'We don't have pressed duck, but we could shove around a chicken for you.'

The day the dinosaurs died...'There's no fortunes in any of these!'

'I think the microwave has finally given up the ghost.'

I find that I can cut back on calories if I use only one chopstick.

Misfortune cookies

Panda leaving chinese take-away with bamboo.

'How is the Peking Duck prepared?' 'I'll break it to her gently.'

"Why don't you just ask the waiter for a knife and fork Brian?"

Obama Snack...

"Man, what I wouldn't do for some Chinese take-out."

'You put the fortunes in AFTER you bake the cookies!'

'Whoever called this job WAITING obviously never did it!'

Misfortune Cookie

'You are about to get a terrible paper cut!'

"This to you left me says you want a wok."

"It says. . . 'That wasn't chicken.'"

'We didn't mean to place an order online. We're just trying to figure out how to turn it on.'