Children's Tv Fan Pillows

'Mister Benn.'

Tweenies on tour.

Pastor of Muppets

'They had to increase security. He's being stalked by a deranged paleontologist.'

That's definitely not a 'Soup' dragon!

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

Humpty Dumpty goes bungee jumping.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"I'm in children's books, myself."

I think you meant to huff 'n' puff at the next house over.

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

"Nostalgia is one helluva drug."

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

TV Situations vacant.

Moses' TV guide.

"Well, now we know what Letterman's doing, what are we doing?"

"Before I begin, I should issue a Tigger warning."

"The bank rejected my application for a 2nd mortgage. They said they didn't have 1 in my size."

"Previously on..."

Lorne Greene

I lost as a contestant on the quiz show, but they gave me this lovely parting gift...

Liz Hurley

Little Miss Muffet Does Lunch

This is a classic TV show called "Father Knows Best." Before Google obviously.

"You've had dogs, cats, birds and even a pony. . . how come your only pets that survive are fish, Arielle?"

After traveling across the universe for thousands of years, an episode of "Leave It To Beaver" is received by an inhabitant of a distant galaxy.

It's on. My new favorite game show! Welcome to: Garbage, recycling or compost?! Dana from New York you can walk away with $10,000 or try to double the green! Double, please. Okay, Dana, here's your object: A takeout container from a local restaurant. Garbage, recycling or compost? Geez. I'm guessing it would depend on whether it's got some cardboard or it's fully biodegradable. Final answer? Recycling. Wrong. Garbage! I knew it. Ridicule her! You've lost your green, loser! I'm sorry. I try so ha

'Well, it WAS worth nine thousand dollars. Sorry about that.'

"Popular astrologer and psychic Malder Tercado's contract with a national Spanish-language TV network was not renewed. Tercado was reportedly surprised by the news...saying he didn't see it coming."

The 3 Stooges Diner. Free Pie. Hah! I know better than to fall for that!

Quentin Blake

"Hi, Timmy. It's Lassie. She's stuck in the well again."

99 Dalmations - Edited for television.

"No, I'm not, no cellphones in high school old. I'm, I fell in love with Betty White in the Golden Girls old."