Child Behavior Enthusiast Gifts

' 'Peppermint thumb' is one of our toughest cases to cure.'

'I've had it up to here with your demonization of the culture of childhood.'

"I'm warning you, young lady. You've got to the count of three before I say 'I'm not kidding'."

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

"But if you cure my hypochondria I won't have any hobbies."

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

"He talks the talk."

"I'll take this one."

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

Dog Bar with Toilets.

Baby's First Words... Hi Guys!

'Humans do it, why couldn't we? Instead of chasing food, we could breed it: It's all explained in my report...'

"He may be neutered and declawed, but he's still dangerous."

"They say you're as smart as a 2-year-old child? As a 2-year-old...I don't see it!"

"They grow up so quickly. It seems like only yesterday that he was in the third grade. Wait, it was yesterday!"

"When I go, I’d like my ashes dumped on top of a squirrel’s head."

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

'I called you in to talk to you about your son not being able to sit still.'

The universe that has me at the center of it is my kind of universe!

"I see a psychiatrist holding a Rorschach test."

Cat going to litter box with newspaper to read.

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

Cat does not want to chase the stick.

"He's so well behaved I'm really worried, doctor."

"Wait ... now I forgot what I was going to bark at you for."

Cat Love Ads: "Are you; 'Stubborn, lazy, unfaithful and psychopathic...with no sense of humour?""

"They took my pellets, man, I been hitting' that lever al day, they took my PELLETS!"

Teacher to king and queen: "He keeps invading other children's space."