Chicken Humor Lover Gifts

'Never try crossing the road during a rally.'

The Rooster Comedian.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

Silence of the Chickens...

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'Knuth! How many times did I tell you not to play with the food??!!'

Dog on a Shelf.

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

'Take my advice kid. Enjoy yourself now, because once you get married, your free ranging days are over.'

'Can he come out and play?'

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

'She looks just like you when you were that age.'

'This race is simply too close to call.'

"I can't believe this! Is there anyone here who isn't too chicken to jump?"

'Let's face it George: we're not spring chickens anymore...'

"Oo, I get to write a memo! I'm excited! I'm excited!"

Seminal moments in Chicken History

"Two roads diverged in a wood and I didn't know which one to cross."

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"I'll tell you how much wood I could chuck if I could—a lot, like, half a cord!"

'Leap frog? No thanks- I'm a toad.'

'Scary movie?'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

A bit of Newlyn.

"I'm not kidding: I am feline too and I do love swimming!"

"Well, it's the same old story, we just don't squark anymore."

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

I loved Venice: So many statues to perch upon and people to feed you...

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

Free Range Chickens