Cheerful Grad Gifts

Teacher and students.

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

'I had no idea there would be a test.'

'But Marvin, you can't be a college graduate for a living!'

"Graduates, faculty, parents, creditors..."

Graduating Zumba Cum Laude

Medical school graduation gowns.

"Just where do you think you're going? You don't have the brains to graduate!"

'We sell gifts for people to give to graduates they know.'

I'm forgetting which college is which. Their brochures are all alike. University of. It's always fall or spring. Apply! There's always a multi-cultural group of kids hanging out. There's always a girl in goggles working in a science lab with an ethnic-looking prof. It's reassuring. They all celebrate their diversity in the exact same way! And charge the exact same for it!

Pre-graduate and post-graduate student.

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

Before graduating, students at Flegburn High were required to read their diplomas out loud.

"Clever girl."

'Do you have one called Job?'

Cards for All Occasions. Wedding. Get Well. Grads. Congrats. Friendship. Birthday. One "graduation" and one "condolences" … He's afraid of the real world.

'I thought he was passing out homework!'

Medical School Graduations.

'..And remember, your success will be measured in how much you donate to the university's alumni fund.'

'I'm now ready to make my own way in the world. But first, can you guys loan me 200 grand to pay off my student loan?'

A Guide to Academic Gowns and Hoods

Admit it! You're gonna miss High School. Best 5 1/2 Years of Your Life.

A credit to his species...

"Wow! Your dog really is smarter than an honor roll student!"

"Put 'er there!"

Western Institute of Architectural Design - Congratulations class of 2005!

'Nice resume but graduating 'summa cum student loan' isn't really something to brag about.'

Their son was in a class of his own.

"Hey! Mine is a list of debt counselors."

Five-Star Canine Obedience School Graduation.

A teacher in mortar board and gown

Instead of caps and gowns, night school graduates have to wear nightcaps and nightgowns.

Law graduate sharks.