Cheeky Linguists Pillows

Bertlitz Language School - New Curse Words.

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

Procrastinators Incorporated

'Marriage? With all your pre-existing conditions Reggie, my HMO would never approve of you'

"Blame the scientists who are teaching me sign-language Mum: It's not my fault if it's easier to learn the rude signs..."

'You're so nice and friendly that I've got nothing to moan about. That's a bit of cheek!'

Artichoking victim

"Tongue twisters! These are hard to say! A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk."

"I think I've eaten something that hasn't agreed with me."

Heart To Heart

"My mom got it on. She said you'd get it off."

"It's an agreeable little wine."

"Standard equipment includes the Manual Anti-Collision Sonic Warning System...otherwise known as the horn."

'Today I learned a little grammar in the classroom and LOTS of vocabulary on the playground!'

"Wanna chill at my place?"

Hospitalized intellectuals are ill-literates.

Roman Golfer.

Things You Say Wher You Are Officially Old - Volume # 1

It's not like you to be late... Forgot to set my alarm cock. (Alarm cock? What did you say that for?!)

"Hey! Are you staring at my assets?!"

'I'm not a wine snob. You're a wine ignoramus.'

'Anything worn under my kilt? No. Well-used but not worn!'

'The frowsting bacchant kept his shelty vicinal.'

"I'm doing well at school. My teacher says I've got an answer for everything."

'Sorry, I'm not available. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you.'

'I want some lessons in back seat driving.'

Good afternoon, Sir. Did you know a canvasser becomes frustrated and violent every 24 minutes in this country?

'Are you on HRT?'

'My former boss will tell you I tend to say inappropriate things. But that's because he's an uptight jerk like you.'

"We've travelled the world looking for our next C.E.O., as was foretold in our corporate legends. We think your little Tim might be that C.E.O."

'Physicists talking dirty'

'When we talk, I have to take a lot for grunted.'

Ha Ha! Better Luck Next Time.