Cheeky Child Fan Gifts

"Math would have been a 'A' if you factor in the fudge factor. I got caught fudging on the final."

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

Geezer.

'Would it make a difference if I told you I was listening to book on audio?'

'It's a pretty lame disappearing act Darling: I think we'd better hire a real Magician for Timmy's birthday party...'

'Bernie, you're not gonna have anything disgusting to hurl at zoo visitors if you forget this.'

Ladmag - Caution, immature content.

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

Barbecue: Touch the Chef Inappropriately!

'The arrows were more practical,,,,but I found these have a higher success rate,'

'I said you could have ONE cookie!' 'I know. I took two HALF moon cookies...'

The Height of Impudence.

The King's New Robes.

Golfer kicking ball out of bush.

Keister Island.

The Living End.

'Just think of it as graphic design, Mom.'

"When it comes to hide and seek I think this might be cheating."

'Dinner was taking too long, so I just went ahead and ordered pizza.'

'My dad is a CEO - don't trust him!'

"He's offered to show me the breast stroke - tonight in his water bed!"

"So, you think clowns are stupid? How about pediatricians, … Do you think they're stupid too?"

Are you a good little girl or boy If not, REPENT today: 'November and December,,,I'm Santa at Macys,'

'Dang, I told him to take a shower before we sacrificed him to the volcano god!'

'We save a fortune each year by running our children through a tax haven.'

'Couldn't you spend just one Christmas at home?'

Slackeroo.

"Should we agree on a safe word?"

'Everybody go home now - or I'll speak this party in nothing but my granny panties.'

'I plead guilty to all charges, but deny any wrongdoing.'

'First the bad news Mister Pringle.You're going home today...

Cleavage, mild cleavage or extra cleavage.

'Your Mom's going to happy hour. Let's order pizza.'

'I hate to ask this on my first day... but can you loan me about 650.00?'