Checkout Chuckler Pillows

'I'm going to have to scan, it could take a while.'

'Unexpected item in bagging area!'

"You're five items short. You'll have to use the express lane. This checkout is 16 items or more only."

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

"She's losing a lot of cream cheese. We're going to have to cut her open."

'It's odd...when I was CEO of Phoenix Industries everybody laughed at my jokes, but since I've been retired, nobody does.'

'I said that I didn't want to be interrupted...'

Frozen Food - Pick Your Own

Kisses--Sniff Your A-hole.

Keyboard in Heaven

"I've got a lot of stuff, a ton of coupons, and I pay by check, so all you behind me...get comfortable!"

"It's weeder's elbow."

'You want a second opinion? -- Oh, a big shot, eh?'

"No, Ted, there's no way I'm going to put up with you working at home. You're a demolition man!"

10 items or less

"It's all very well being healed, but that mobility scooter cost a fortune."

STRIP Hambone: Computer health analysis

'Sir, wait! You can't go yet! The register hasn't finished spitting out all your valuable coupons.'

'As many items as I want or no customer!'

"Damn it—I think I just butt-donated to a charity."

"What's all this I've been hearing about the Cloud?"

'Is it my fault the supermarket trolley had a mind of its own?'

Elderly couple bearing a sign: '...We take ages.'

"Who's next?"

"This is Plan A. I recommend we skip it and get right on to Plan B."

"Unidentified object in bagging area!"

'Hey - I was in line first! There you go again...messing up the pecking order!'

Express till 'Ten over priced items or less'

Supermarket Self Service Checkout

Price check on (barcode)!

Cash Only QUIK SHOP: NO checks! NO credit! NO coupons! NO small talk!

Waiting In Doctor's Office

"Scan my own items, bag my own food? If I wanted to work here, I'd fill out an application!"