Checkout Chuckles Pillows

'Is it my fault the supermarket trolley had a mind of its own?'

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

Only One Item or Fewer.

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"

Frozen Food - Pick Your Own

'SALE! One Million Dollars Per Bike!!' by saying, 'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

"How much of this stuff can I eat before it can no longer be returned?"

'Blimey, you must have charged for the trolley as well!'

Great moments in shopping

Bank Checking Accounts. Yes, deposits are guaranteed, sir --- but withdrawals aren't.

"Let's see now; rat's gizzard, bats wings, eye of newt....oh, yes. And cornflakes!"

Shopping Trolley

'Sir, wait! You can't go yet! The register hasn't finished spitting out all your valuable coupons.'

Border Guard

Fresh milk - Self service

Hell for cashiers.

Snowman tries on carrot noses.

'Which eight do you want?'

'Sorry, the bag boy's down with the flu,'

"Will this be cash or consumer debt?"

Market items.

"Oh, that's a tricky one...now let me think...'Would I like a carrier bag..?' hmm..."

"Paper or Plastic?"

no nonsense or ridiculous pantyhose.

I shopped in the Garden of Eden.

'Oh that's actually for here, not to go.'

'Unexpected item in bagging area!'

'I'm going to have to scan, it could take a while.'

"I never use the Express Lane. I like to keep my money a little longer."

'The store was out of light bulbs, so I got lite beer instead.'

12 items or less. 12 items or else.

Express till 'Ten over priced items or less'

'Lady, your 'just browsing' is costing me 23 security cameras and 3 floor detectives.'

"Oh great! It's the Coupocalypse."