Check-in Champ Pillows

"Is this your husbands first flight?"

Inclusive speech

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

Examinations.

'Is there such a thing as over communicating?'

We never got anything done around here until we invented verbs.

'I suppose the word 'patient' is used because that's what you have to be!'

"The checkout clerk will now testily remind you to press 'ok'."

"So what brings you in today?"

Checkout for $385.00 or more.

"Look, I'm the bobblehead of this team."

'Sir, your suitcase is quantitatively challenged.'

'You have to give up this devil-may-care fattitude.'

Bird on phone: 'Hold on, I have caw waiting.'

"Is it a 'personal attack' if I can prove he’s an idiot?"

"Let's just get through the first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

"I'm ready. Are you ready? Let the billing begin!"

Nature Scents Research Department.

Tescos: 'Oh no! There's no chocolate at the checkout!'

'You're the first person to ask for a shopping hour in addition to a lunch hour.'

'I have yopur lab results. Some of your readings are too high and some are too low. No, they don't balance out.'

'That's Jeb Lambert. He was actually the first one to say 'paper or plastic'. Before that everyone said 'plastic or paper'... I mean, can you imagine?'

Edna's Doctor Fantasy

"Since I never accepted any more challenges after my win against the hare, I remain undefeated..."

'Yes, I'm age 68, just a few more years to go before retirement! Here's your ticket, sir. Greetings to the pilot, he's my dad!'

'If you want to save your marriage, tell each other you're sorry.' 'Youre sorry!'

"Whenever I try counting my flock I fall asleep."

'The bad news is that we've had to inform clients of drastic cuts to services...We managed to do it in 17 languages!'

"Come on, you can get up. Just think about that nice soft swivel chair down at the office."

'Hey, I just noticed something. So you know what you get if you cover the 'c' in potato chips? Potato hips, isn't that funny?'

'We're never going to sort out our marital problems like this. Can't we speak to one of your colleagues, darling?'

Game Over. - Son beating father at chess.

"Anyway, Her Royal Highness here insists I'm sarcastic."