Chatty Friend Gifts

Blah blah blah.

'What's wrong? Have you got laryngitis?'

"Oh, she just wants attention or needs help."

"You just carpe, carpe, carpe."

'Another good thing to remember, don't talk when he's trying to hit the ball.'

'It's a text from Mike - Sorry I'm L8 B THR in a crrrrassssssh!!! ARRRRGGGHHH....;p'

'I've got an addictive personality.'

"When nature calls, so does everyone else."

Yak, Yak Yak, Yak Yak Yak.

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

Text Culture

Time for tea and friendship.

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

'There's a bench over there why not sit down and rest your weary mouth?'

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

"You're suffering from extreme laziness."

"The difference between us and them is...they can be reproduced by unskilled labour."

"I'd appreciate a little more reacting to my ranting."

'Do you come here often?'

Shall I be mother?

"I just want someone who texts me as often as Joe Biden does, you know?"

White Wine Wisdom (2)

A guy tries his luck at the water cooler.

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

Communication

''Is there anybody there?'

Social media messages

Getting together to chew the fat.

'I didn't spend $49.95 on this answering machine to have you just hang up so leave a message!'

'How did you cope before 24-hour rolling gossip?'

"If you need me, I'll be in my room watching YouTube videos, texting, Skyping and blowing off my homework."