Chat-up Line Collector T-Shirts

How about a date tonight? No way...I am getting married today! Well, how about tomorrow then?

'Did you just hear that? We are now and endangered species and mating is now our top priority!'

"My wife doesn't understand you."

'Excuse me, Miss, but I believe that we've met previously.'

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"You seem dangerous. I like that."

'This must be heaven, because you sure look like an angel....'

"Why so grim, handsome?"

'Do you come here often?'

'Try his land line.'

OMG UR HOT

"Fancy crashing at my pad later, babe?"

"'You're the reason I crossed the road'? Really?! Is that your best pick-up line?"

"So, Owen tells me you guys met in art school."

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

'Hello, handsome - is that a Billy Cotton ringtone?'

'You had me at hell.'

'Did you just hear that? Scientist say we are now an endangered species and mating should be our top priority!'

"Norman, let's lend out the Olmec head."

Bell invents the telephone.

"Would you care for something to talk about during dinner?"

"I've traveled billions of light-years and visited countless planets. Earth is the only place I can't get a signal."

"But it wouldn't be premarital sex unless we got married."

'Uh, nich tchotchkes, sir.'

Furniture faux pas: The coffee table coffin

"In the olden days, people used payphones. Beats me how they took selfies!"

"I just pick a new one each season. How else would you get a new Apple?"

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid your son just isn't very smart."

'I wish you wouldn't refer to me as your running mate!'

'Hiya, spaceman.'

Listenin' in

"Do you have any weird sex kinks?"

You insist on having the last word don't you?

'I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to sell you that smart phone without first verifying your IQ.'

'Why Mr.Jones.. Is that you playing FTSE with me under the table? '