Charming Gentleman Gifts

'Cologne sir?'

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

Why we need poetry. . .

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

"But don't let my wacky tie fool you. We actually take business very seriously around here."

Young costermonger trying to sell to a gentleman.

"Oh Gregori! You tell such funny stories!"

'I do so much better with women when I quit trying to understand them and just repeat what they say to each other.'

"Ladies! Ladies! Do you wanna roll my Mercedes..."

Romance in Pink

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 1

Lover

"Everybody's just a teensy bit in love with me. How about yourself?"

"He's such a gentleman, he didn't use a 'mating call' to attract me: he's developed a 'please join me on a date' call..."

'You're an estate agent aren't you?'

'Hello, handsome - is that a Billy Cotton ringtone?'

"The woman I marry will be beautiful, a great cook, intelligent, pleasant and rich."

His movember moustache made him feel very distinguished.

Social butterfly

'Charles, we hired you distinctly because you're a people person.'

"Hey, baby - that doesn't mean you!"

Colonel Bagshot.

"I don’t know if this is just the cashews talking, but I find you absolutely delightful."

Two sides to a question

Like a fine wine, some me improve with age.

"Man cannot live on bread alone - he needs a bit of crumpet too."

Bartender: 'Take it from me buddy,stay clear of that one.She's only interested in your money.'

"Daddy? How do you keep your hands so soft?"

My mother was right about you. I guess I can take that as a compliment as long as I don't ask, "How so?"

Gentlemen

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 3

". . .'Something to give the man who has everything'?... How about my phone number?"

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 6

A Bad Time for John Thomas.

Gentlemen's graffiti: 'Your Mother is merely an adequate cook.'