Chaotic Carpooler Gifts

Mom! Kate's dad had their car again! Olivia's parents are out of town. Lizzie's mom is sick. Can you pick us up after practice? I'm sick too, you know! Sick of car-pooling! She'll be there!

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

I drive, therefore I am.

"Stay-at-home mom" is a misnomer. I spend ten hours a day driving kids all over town!

Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.

A mother drives a mini-van full of kids; her bumper sticker reads "I'd rather be working".

Excess Baggage: The younger the traveler, the greater the amount of luggage required.

Clown-filled vehicle in the car pool lane

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

"Am I a new parent? No, I'm a new Uber driver taking him to school."

The Feng Shui of the road must be off.

Woman Ruins Fishing Trip By Feeding the Fish.

"Walter had an attack of road rage in the driveway."

How do fish get to work?

'Nope. He doesn't qualify you for the carpool lane.'

"You car pool guys will be going down together for x-rays."

The great big holiday to-do list.

'They've been carpooling together for 30 years.'

"Move over, pardner, yer ridin' in the horsepool lane!"

'This one's a hood ornament. I got it for carpooling.'

I'm late. Nothing you can say will convince me to drive you to school. O.K. Slam!

What's in your back seat? Nothing. There's paper everywhere, and dirty clothes, and something that smells like a drunk threw up and then rolled around in it. That looks like ancient cheese. Introducing: The flaw. You haven't cleaned this since the '90s. Big whoop.

Car Pools.

'I forgot my keys!'

"Is it me or is the commute to work getting worse?"

"I don't believe I care for anything, thank, you. I'm just in their car pool."

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

"There's a guy in the trunk."

Circus. It's been fun working with these circus performers on their financial planning. Those clowns are serious savers! Yeah, they've cut expenses by carpooling. The highwire walker wants a portfolio with a mixture of stocks and bonds. Having balance is her highest priority! And the lion tamer is interested only in very safe investments --- He has zero tolerance for more risk in his life. Our last meeting today is with the trapeze artist. What is your net worth? Every penny it cost!

'They all work from home now, but still get together for carpool reunions.'

"I thought that driving around all day picking kids up and dropping them off, then waiting for them,would be more fulfilling."

'I know moms can drive you crazy, but they can drive you lots of other places, too!'

'Why do they call it the school RUN Mummy?'

'Apparently the car pool has a dress code I was not aware of and so now I have to take the bus like some idiot.'

'Lots of people have longer commutes than you.'