Ceremony Organizer Gifts

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

Face painting.

'Okay.. what the hell.'

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

Face painting by numbers.

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'No, but thanks for asking,'

"Please hold applause until end of dragon."

'The correct response, Tanya, is 'I do' not 'yeah, whatever'.'

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

'Cheryl, you are getting way too wrapped up in the dog.'

"Not guilty?"

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

'You should have seen the one that got away!'

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

Folk Wedding

'We've postponed the wedding until we come up with something we can do at the ceremony that will become a viral video.'

'They call it the people dance.'

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

Who are the most important people at the World Cup?

'Does my head look big in this?'

Extra Long-jump

New Year's Eve party for dogs

'Sorry, I always cry at weddings...'

A baby being christened in a scuba mask.

GLAD-YOU-ATION

"Don Wood? I don't know any Don Wood!"

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

"It's OK vicar, Nigel's just having one of his panic attacks."

... And by the end of the first quarter of the game, the famous 'Man Cave' was completely deserted.

Please Do Not Throw Cups of Beer At The Players... It's A Waste of Beer.'