Ceremony Giggler Gifts

I can't talk now. She said WHHHAT?? Call me back in five minutes!

Clown God

Graduates on their phones

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

'I can't hire you, but I can sell you some stock in the company.'

2pm meet your Creator

Moses' first encounter with the burning bush didn't go well.

"Hello. I'm here to install the new pastor."

'Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for the people who have to work with you.'

"You may now kiss the... Oh, I see you have already done that!"

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

If you ask me, pets shouldn't be allowed in the House of Commons...

Freeway exit signs: Regulation, Deregulation, Reregulation.

'Man, I'm bombing,'

"Can you write 'To Mandy - you're the best'?"

I am one with stupid.

'A funny thing happened to me on the way to the church tonight..'

'I'm sorry, but 'I'll see how I feel on the night' isn't really acceptable.'

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

'Whoops!'

'Lettuce pray!'

'Big Issue!'

"God it was rough coming into the office this morning after the awards ceremony" "It must have been, you work two doors down"

'They're evolving like mad -- You put in way too many cosmic rays!'

RETIREMENT VOWS

When suddenly the clouds parted and down came Jeez, a god appalled by how his name is used in vain.

Fortunately the Pastor didn't realize it, but his wife's new 'mod' hat was actually a clever disguise for two canisters of coffee.

"I now pronounce you guilty."

"Due to a breakdown in communication, 'Nilla Wafers' will be used for the communion service."

Jesus Seals the Hick...