Centenarian Celebration Pillows

'He's disappointed with the Queen's card - he wanted a rude one!'

"Old? I'll say she's old- she had a telegram on her hundredth- from Queen Boadicea!"

Dating is so expensive...

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

Things I love about Powell River...

"Regular service or affected?"

Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you, brother? My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony. But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike? Of course. That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all. Exactly ... Wait, what do you mean by that?

"Your press kit said you were lots of fun."

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

"If they give you any trouble, find a good babysitter and go out for the evening."

"You're not goin' anywhere, Roy. You buried your own nuts again."

Wife asking husband what resolutions he is going to make for the new century

Love Fest 50th Reunion: Sewing any remaining wild oats encouraged!

"He said his goal was to make it to 100."

The y2k bug being chased by the JFK bug

Birthday cakes on porch on hot day

Pension in race with tortoise and snail.

"Let's face it,Rhoda-you're no spring chicken yourself!"

'Your iceberg salad, Captain!'

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

'This is such an appropriate way for us to celebrate our GOLDEN wedding anniversary."

'I bet you thought I'd forgotten our anniversary.'

'Remember when he was younger and his invisible friends did not require a high speed Internet connection?'

'Yeahh...I remember you...You're that...one guy.'

'One hundred is the new ninety!'

'You look younger...are you colouring your hair?'

At 103 years old... Joan was herself, a 'fairground attraction'!

"My husband has such a good memory: He's never missed a birthday or a wedding anniversary..."

"We got a sympathy card. Our anniversary is next week"

Gift Suggestions for Post-Diamond Wedding Anniversaries

"It's our anniversary. Bring us your best bottle of beer!"

'Thus the big party.'

Happy 100th Birthday

"Bigger cake."

'I'm on century duty.'