New Century Celebration Pillows

Wife asking husband what resolutions he is going to make for the new century

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

Come dine with me!

2021

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Squirrels Stockpiling Mulling Spices for Winter

Reach for the Star.

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

'Progress of a bookshelf'

Colour Version: Living by the Clock

Things to do: 1. Sit 2. Stay 3. Sit 4. Stay

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Cimafunk

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

Be Healthy

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

Bubbly

"Happy Gnu Year!"

"I don't like the looks of that!"

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

"We have an acronym!"

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

"AHHHH, MORNING!"