Cemetery Workers Gifts

"Time to knock off for lunch?"

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Man runs scared from ringing graveyard bell.

Pet Cemetery.

Joint Ventures!

'Wasn't there three of you guys when we started?'

"Just to be clear, you want suicide doors installed on your hearse?"

Baptism - "Actually he's quite looking forward to it."

Too Much SOY

'Grave rage Vicar, we get a lot of it now.'

"Mt. Joe Cemetary?"

"Mom, Dad – I’d like you to meet Edna."

"You didn't fill out our customer survey."

"Mum, can I work in a morgue"

"Grave rage, Vicar, we get a lot of it now"

"No skulls, just whatever you can carry home..."

"I feel like we're drifting apart."

Gravedigger

"It was 2am and time for another unauthorized tanning session for the boys on the crematorium's night shift."

'Tomb of the unkown Scottish goalie.'

Tomb of the Unknown Sculptor.

"Oh my God, mother! That is, like, so passive-aggressive!"

Ignitas

"First, let me say how much I appreciate your 6-foot social distancing."

Andy Griffith Tombstone.

Oakland cemetery: moved!

'Well,it's been real nice chatting with you Ron,and should you ever fancy a guided tour throughout the City Morgue,here's my card...' (a morgue worker handing over a 'toe tag').

He was always so sweaty.

Here lies Rufus J. Tosser. Inventor of the boomerang hand grenade.

Larry! Larry! Can you hear me?'

'Behind the scenes at a crematorium.'

Here Lies John Doe

Roadkill Cemetery

Deliverance

'Someday, someone else will mow this lawn.'