Celestial Events Fan Gifts

Nativity with the star crashing into the stable.

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

"And that little pinpoint of light? That’s our new baby."

"I must have pressed the wrong button."

'Let's see what they're screwing up today.'

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

Paradise FC: The Blessed Y The Rest.

Weinberg's egregious error would damage his reputation forever, His colleagues would thereafter refer to him as 'the big double dipper,

No caption. (An astronomer looks through a high-powered telescope while a baby in a crib looks through a hand-held scope).

Glimpses One Dollar

You are everywhere.

"Gazing at stars really makes you realise the insignificance of your co-workers."

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

"Do you hear what I hear?"

'I hate to break it to you, but moons don't grow up to be planets OR stars.'

"I'll have whatever they're having."

'Whoops!'

The Moon Falls Out of the Sky.

Efforts Results In Seeing Stars

"I'm not unhappy, just surprised at all the other denominations that are here."

Sun Wearing Sunglasses/Moon Wearing Night Vision Goggles

Angels Playing Frisbee with a Halo.

'What's the wi-fi like?'

The real reason for the hole in the ozone layer.

'He seems nice.'

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Celestial Sadie, In the Western sky after sunset, Jupitor can be seen nearly aligned with Venus. What do you make of this? R. Yates. Excellent question. That reminds me of a long lost civilization, in which there was no such thing as a typo. Where no one ever hit the wrong key because they wrote letters by hand. Eventually, it became so obsessed with speed that it began typing everything, and so inconsiderate that it soon stopped bothering to proo

Shoot for the moon or die in the vacuum of space

'They come down here to smoke.'

'They're plowing you? -- how does it feel?', 'Groovy!'

"Astronomers say I don't have a 'dark' side. Tell that to my therapist."

Magazine Stand at the Pearly Gates

CPA. It looks like some of our clients might have tax problems this year. Halley's Comet files a return only once every 75 years. And the black hole seems to be hiding lots of income. Neither Pluto nor Mars can pay what they owe. Pluto's assets are frozen. And Mars isn't called the "Red Planet" for no reason. I think earth might be the only one getting a refund. Of course, it has billions of dependents!

"The Lord has heard your prayers and has sent me to say unto you, shut up about it already."

'They're evolving like mad -- You put in way too many cosmic rays!'