Celestial Documentarian Pillows

"Don't mind me. I'm just doing a documentary..."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

'She barely made it out of the atmosphere... next!'

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

'I must be reaching that age! I can't get my ozone layer up anymore!'

Water is discovered on the moon....

Local News in Heaven

Kirsten Johnson

"This connect the dots is taking FOREVER!"

"And where do you see yourself in the next 7-8 billion years?"

'It's all done with computer animation now.'

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

Michael Moore creates a UK equivalent of Fahrenheit 9/11

"It's a good show, but I'm pretty sure it's a limited series."

'Those are the Divinity students.'

An amplified harp

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

"No word from the company – but, it's clear that this is a major spill."

'I was on my way to Heaven, when they stumbled across my blog...'

Oops! Maybe we better make the chicken first.

"Dad, if there's a plot to the universe, can you see any spoilers?"

Heaven

God creating the galaxy.

"I still maintain an online presence."

'No, please, go on. It's so refreshing to talk to someone with an entirely different point of view.'

Life on cloud 8

Social lens of the photojournalist

'Millions of billions of trillions of light years away? I could visualise it if you said it in MILES!'

"Sometimes I miss a good smiting."

"Say what you like about Hell, at least they have solid floors."

"Up here everything is pretty much opposite."