Celebrity Parenting Guru T-Shirts

"Remember, Kimberly, I'm more than your agent. I'm your mother."

'What's play?'

"Darling... I think the Baby's been eating the fridge magnets again."

"Is there a vegan option?"

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Six-tier Communal Cradle.

"It's true, mommy...the chocolate bunny attacked me - it was self-defense!"

Playing Mozart to the baby.

"Migration? I love chasing the endless summer, but travelling such distances with kids is exhausting..."

'You the one who called Amnesty International?'

'Oh, don't mind Jeff. It's just his turn to change the Baby's nappy.'

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

The AdRams Family no.13 - Exams

'sugar and spice my eye.'

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

'Is it okay to apologize for something I'm going to do?'

"Adorable. Is yours a rescue too?"

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

'Before we begin, he's the one that's been helping me with my homework.'

Parent Involvement Tip #1

Sometimes nature not only calls; she makes an emergency breakthrough.

'The best way to teach my son is by example, you know: Monkey see, monkey do...'

'Dad, I don't need a two-thirds majority to over-ride your veto. I've got mom.'

A Boy and His Mother

"Do you ever get the feeling that maybe the baby is listening to us?"

"Remember this about new babysitters - making rules and enforcing them are two different things.".

"Now you know how Daddy feels when Mommy overdraws the checkbook."

Look at it this way: You're changing the future of the nation...one diaper at a time!

Gangs of New York

Penguin kid to parents: 'Big deal! You're grounding me!'

"Don't make me turn this covered wagon around!"