Celebrity Entertainment Gifts

'What a dream!!Catherine Zeta Jones washed up AND wiped!!!'

"Dad, has there EVER been a time when James Corden was funny..?"

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

They hated me.

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

Showbiz Awards

Benedict Cumberbatch

Albert Einstein

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"I think he was a celebrity."

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

A Guide to Balloon Animals

Television Readers.

Champagne

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

The Rooster Comedian.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

Cow Show Tunes

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

Lesser known greek gods,

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."