Celebrating Long-term Marriage Gifts

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

Lesbian civil partnership.

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

Albert & Myra - The End Story

Happy Valentine's Day.

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Reading the sports pages.

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"Twenty five years... I think it's time we renew our towels."

French horn.

"You kept me awake all night, grinding your gums."

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

'Silly thing, of course I still find you repulsive.'

"Happy anniversary, Clare. How'd you make it so many years?" "Figured it wasn't worth the prison time."

Romance

"It's chirp, chirp, chirp time again, isn't it?"

Bride playing cello

"We should never have committed binary fission!"

"Yes, you've taught me a thing or two - but over twenty-plus years that's not much."

"Stop undressing me with your eyes."

"I hunt, she gathers, but we always get together for cocktails at five."

"Are you still mad at me?" "Mentally I'm storming off right now."

"Martin, did we ever get our freak on?"

"Well, old girl, this is the third act. What, if anything, do we have up our sleeve?"

"Don't you think after thirty years of marriage you could stop referring to me as 'the military'?"

'You were married to him for 40 years. He never once mentioned he was having his head cryogenically frozen?'

"Of course you don't look anything like your reflection in the mirror."

Two men toasting

"We've been married 32 years. How can you possibly still be in beta?"

Assisted Living.

Dead Silence: a restaurant for married people

'Face it dear, we are as old as we look!'

"Synchronized sitting"