Cattle Conjurer Gifts

You are never further than 2.6 yards away from a cow.

'Needs salt!'

Bright Idea

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

Witch's Brew.

Ghostbasters 3

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

Goldylocks and the Three Beers.

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

The Thinker and Creative Thinker.

"I'm writing a memoir. It's mostly recipes."

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"You think you're so damn Cordon Bleu!"

'There's been an update. Instead of abracadabra, it's option/control key.'

"Don't hold back on the toad legs now - I'm through with Nouvelle Cuisine!"

'Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public. Ethical advertising uses the truth to deceive the public.'

Advertising Agency - "...Fooling some of the people all of the time is damn hard work."

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

My Cauldron Rules

"Anyone having a 'Eureka!' moment?"

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

"Let 'em try to regulate this!"

'This is taking forever. We should've just microwaved it.'

"Eye of newt, wing of bat, blah blah blah, here's one I made earlier."

Fallen Angel.

'I wish you'd cook dinner!'

Blockbuster book adaptations gone wrong.

'Dad says you can throw your voice. Toss it here.'

Balancing Act.

"I should have never let you watch those cooking shows on TV!"

"Don't write it!"

"The usual, please."

"She works best in hex mode."