Cat Prankster Pillows

'I must be losing it. I forgot to try to trip someone walking down the stairs today.'

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

'But he qualifies for medicare in dog years.'

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

"Hello? Guys? Okay, I've had a long day and I'm very tired, so no pranks this time. I'm serious... guys?!"

"I always get the 'Good Boy.' How about the 'Bad Dog' for a change?"

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

'I don't think Marmaduke has ever seen a vegetarian before.'

"Pssst. Fake poop."

"But some of my best ideas come while I'm in the litter box."

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

-'Okay Rebel, find the drugs.' -'Are you kidding? There's dirty underwear here!'

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Pied Piper

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"

"That damn dog's scratching again!"

A faulty part from an independent supplier leads to the creation of a multibillion-dollar sports medicine profession.

"It was trick to assemble, as my lab assistant kept taking bones and burying them outside."

Welcome to the urban farm. A bit of country in the city.

'Dog got your clog?'

'He followed me home. Can I keep him, mum? Can I?'

The Curiosity Mars rover is seen killing a cat: 'Mission accomplished.'

Self-walking dog

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Balloon

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

'Its old Mrs Smith again, I am pretty sure its because she can't afford the vets bills she says the appointment is for her nephew.'

Unbeknown to others, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

All items on the premises have been marked for identification: 'My cat sprayed everything in the house.'