Casual Gambling Pillows

'He had lots of visitors today. Mostly people he owes money to.'

Speed Dating for Turtles

'The reason I like this guy's stock picks is, he's not burdened by having any experience in finance whatsoever.'

Knights of the bedside table.

"Wordle in two! You hear me? Two!!"

"Incidentally, my men's group has retrograded into a poker game."

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

"Hey, Stretch. Mind if we play through?"

You invested in Facebook?! How could you? That bugs you? You, of all people, are mad that the FTC is suing Meta Platforms in an antitrust case? No, I mean how can you afford to invest? If you can afford to buy stock, then I pay you way too much. It was only $40! Quiet, I'm calculating your pay cut.

'Stocks rose on news that '90% of success is just being there.''

Shhh – I'm taking a virtual nap.

"Before we start, does anyone fancy a bet on the outcome?"

Comparing lottery odds with bus punctuality.

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

"You're only as old as you feel, right, honey? And today, I feel like being 24!"

Valentine man in underpants.

...I told you never to enter without knocking

Caddy With A Cool Box

Players fight over a board-game called 'Squabble'.

Company Shares - I wouldn't fancy buying any in a company I work for.

"My handicap? I'm a poor loser."

I don't know much about Tennis...

"Single malt scotches are good but I prefer regular old comfort booze."

"Words with Friends with Benefits."

No, I'm not a gambler at all. I just blow on these and they keep serving me drinks.

Old Fred's Seat

'I'm making pot pie.'

Impulse Investors Welcomed.

Job centre - casual jobs; rotten, insecure low-paid jobs;dull, boring, repetitive jobs; Jobs that no-one in their right mind would consider.

"A quick pint, Mavis, I'm running on empty!"

'Once again, Stuart was heading the leaderboard at the office golf open'

How to win the Lottery. - Scratch 'n' read edition.

'Leisure complex' sign with bouncy arrow for 'Billiards'

'A couple of games of tic tac toe and we'll be in the right frame of mind to discuss your condition.'