Casual Forecaster Gifts

"Today's weather forecast, is very accurate."

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

I'm not good with names but never forget a face. Of course, that's not very useful right now.

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

European currency on the edge.

Businessman in suit on beach with financial report and eyes cut out viewing impending storm.

'Ho,ho,ho, but can you be more specific?'

Indigenous knowledge vs. climate projections and weather forecasts.

'Call the boss! We're in trouble!'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

'Anorak anoraks'.

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

"I just haven't been feeling very omnipotent lately."

'I can see a visit to the vet, but, oh my, no more kids after that!...'

"What's the final episode of 'Seinfeld' about?""It's about nothing."

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

Snail Racing

Re-Tooling Costs - "Could you be a little more precise than umpteen million?"

'At least I don't have his life.'

Vinnie's Billiards: 'Heck of a break, Ron!'

"I wouldn't stand there, if I were you."

Annual Pollsters Convention. Wow, who could've predicted such a low turnout?

Teddy queuing for the Bathroom

'...Sometimes the sheer monotony of it all just gets me down.'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

Pessimists v Optimists.

"The margin of error is plus or minus one hundred percent."

'Look, dear, they offer cloud storage for optimistic economic projections...it's called Cloud 9.'

'You can't win - a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but ignorance is no excuse!'