Casual Diner King Gifts

Fast Food

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Diner.

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

"Fresh pepper?"

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

How The Sausage Is Eaten

Countervailing Clichés.

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'How is the water prepared?'

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'The customer is always right...'

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

'What wine do you recommend with the peanut butter-filled, deep fried, jalapeno bacon bombs?'

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....