Casual Cohabiter Pillows

'We were divorced, remarried, and divorced again. Now we're just living together.'

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

'Anorak anoraks'.

'I bet you think I'm drinking tea...'

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'At least I don't have his life.'

Teddy queuing for the Bathroom

'I'm doing a wine tasting course, it's fascinating. . .'

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

"That word-puzzle gloat of yours is getting old fast."

"I just realized that unless I'm riding for some cause, I must look like an idiot."

"Just say the word and I'll love you."

"After the truffle season peaks, we like to kick back and do a little clamming."

"Good night. Sleep quietly."

Colin V Longshore Drift

I think my girlfriend is moving in.

90% of annoying habits are discovered after you start living together.

"Any pain relief with the cannabis?"

"Frankly, I could move a lot faster, but the truth is that I lack motivation..."

"You go right on snoring, doesn’t bother me one bit. Your snores are beautiful, do you know that? I love snoring…not like some people."

'I simply don't know what I'd do with mother, if it wasn't for the squatters!'

'Oh no, it's that 'come hither and do the dishes' look.'

"Your hogging the covers again."

'Watching the football.'

"It's god's little get-back.... She had special haloes made for those who never put down the toilet seat."

"Can I move in with you?"

"A movie? I would rather watch this!"

'You go and take stacks of photos. I'm going to read and I'll look at them when we get back to England.'

"Hey, look on the bright side, at least we're not wine coolers."

"I think you may need to start seeing me twice a week for a while."