Casual Careerist Gifts

'No thanks! Knowing what I'm supposed to be doing might throw me off.'

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

My brilliant career

"How should we divide the teams?"

"Colin kept the bar fairly low."

Snail Racing

"I hope you're good, Charlie. I've only played a couple of times."

Vinnie's Billiards: 'Heck of a break, Ron!'

'Maybe we could hold the wedding on 'Casual Friday'.'

'I have never seen a resume prepared in pastels and oil paint. How long have you been unemployed?'

'W e e e l l . . . my mum says I'm good at testing the patience of saints'

"Your experience is impressive and your qualifications excellent but I'm afraid you're let down by not being the same as everyone else."

'I try to go to the office once-a-week just to see how I'm doing.'

I never realized what a bad golfer I was until somebody else kept score. Club House.

"But I want a career, a family, and a cracker"

'I think casual fridays are getting too casual.'

A Flag in One

Carrying burdens - Ghetto blaster

"Done already? Wow!" "Yup, a new record. Just under two years."

Appointment for Central London Executive - With Car and Parking Space

"We're just like one big happy family here."

"I'm counting that as a stroke for each time you went around."

"Arlen keeps bragging about running 26 miles. What he fails to tell people is that it took him eight months to do it."

"Any other skills?"

"Haven't you guys ever heard of 'casual Fridays'?"

Welcome to Springdale...'We're number 10, 11, or maybe 12!'

Sorry, Mr Arbutnot, I'm not interested

"It was just that one time that you won the Nobel Prize, wasn't it, dear?"

'So you're the boy who wants to be a health and safety officer.'

"I don't think I'm ever going to get a hole in one!"

Wine Shotput

"Miss Holder, in the future, please refrain from using hearts in the place of dots."

And now sit back and enjoy nature as you've not seen it before...

The Paula Ratcliffe: 'Think I might do the London Marathon next year.'

'Is my job performance review over yet?'