Castle Adventures T-Shirts

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

"He's his own worst enemy."

"What the hell took so long?"

"Early model of baggage claim"

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"Whosoever slays this dragon may marry the princess."

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

"This makes Pamplona seem like child's play."

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

'Sure, real estate prices are sky-high, but kings don't sell their castles, and that's that.'

Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

"Bob, the whole Cupid thing is a metaphor."

'Damn, I knew that disabled access would be our undoing.'

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

"His Excellency the Lord Premier Gooboy."

"Is 'family' friend of foe?"

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."

Clearing the castle's moat.

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'

"You fools! That's not the boiling oil, that's my beef casserole!"

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."