Carpet Cleaner's Conundrum Gifts

'They call me Spot because I leak on carpets.'

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

"I miss the Augean stables."

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

"The good news is...you've one less window to wash."

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

"Thank God you're home. Someone crapped on the carpet again."

Woman puts a targeting sight on her vacuum cleaner.

'I don't understand it - there was a little pile of solar dust from Advanced Composition Explorer right here a moment ago.'

'Well, it WAS a pretty coffee table until Dave spilled coffee on it!'

'You're experienced with blood stains I trust?' (Smarthy ACME Carpet Cleaners)

"That one killed my manservant, it fell on his head while he was vacuuming the carpet."

'Only the high-traffic path needs cleaning - from the couch to the bar.'

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

'I'd like to come over, but Mom cleaned my room and it's going to take me all day to put it right again.'

Carpet cleaner.

Make it look like an accident. Carpet cleaners.

"Baldo, I finally got that stain out of your favorite shirt! Of course, I had to use my scissors."

'No spring cleaning for me: I get a cleaner to come over in winter while we're asleep...'

"Ok, you wash, you dry...."

'I can't take anymore, Gladys - I'm asking for a transfer to pottery !'

"We really need to have our rugs vacuumed professionally one of these days."

'I said shag carpeting.'

'I won't bother you, Mr. Gridley... I just wanted to see how it would feel to walk barefoot on your plush carpeting...'

'I am sorry about this vicar, but my wife has just had new carpets fitted.'

Corporate Ladder.

"We had an expert restore all the original shag carpeting."

'...it's probably blood on the boardroom carpet.'

A woman's work is never done.

'Wall-to-wall carpets go on the floor, not on the walls.'

'Ah, you must be the cleaner. I'm the dirtier.'

Lord of the Rungs: Window Cleaner

Carpet cleaning

'Didn't you remove the bird before washing the cage?'