Card Writing Gifts

"Writing Christmas cards shouldn't be this complicated dear!"

We make a Valentine's card out of edible flowers that's been dipped in chocolate. It's got EVERYTHING!

"It's crazy here! They're all on recreational rugs."

Bingo night.

"Okay, I'll renew your contract and raise you five sick days."

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

'What do you mean - you 'LET him win'?'

'I've lost my mojo, Marjorie.'

'I'm dreaming of a green Christmas, with every recycled Christmas card I write...'

'Harvey does all his own 'get well' cards.'

Worm Bed

'Why do you always win at cards but not horses? I can't shuffle the horses.'

"Read the card! Read the card!"

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

'I'm at that awkward age when I can't read my own handwriting. Do they teach penmanship in college?'

Magicians monkey.

'I think I'll raise.'

"Yeah, the Declaration of Independence is beautiful! What font is that?"

'... Geez! This guy's got the poker face from hell.'

Valentines for Things

'Did you think that since so few people now use a manual typewriter, I wouldn't notice that you'd typed your penmanship homework?'

"This app encrypts verbal communications. My doctor's handwriting is all we need to encrypt everything else."

I love Fountain Pens

Cheese Call Center

High Stakes Texas Hold 'Em

"I'm sorry, Ma, but we're forced to sell the art collection."

Roses are occasionally red. Violets are violet not blue. I'm a pedant. So there!

'First, you have to admit you have a gambling problem!'

"Here's where you reassure me that this is work-related."

Killing time, and vice versa....

'Never say, 'but everyday is children's day!' '