Car Whisperers T-Shirts

'No-Freaking-Idea-Speak.'

'Here's your problem, mate. You know nothing about cars, and I could be telling you any old rubbish.'

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

"These new cars have so many sensors, they're ticklish."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

Braiding a Horse's Tail

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Touring Cyclist

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

A Girl and Her Horse

'...and that is my philosophy.'

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

Car Dentistry.

'In her day, she did all the work for me, now I'm doing all the work for her.'

"Look, the numbers don't lie."

Perhaps we could get the Saatchis to pain a pretty picture.

We don't want statistics that reflect the actual market situation. We want statistics that reflect what was decided in this boardroom!

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

Psychic Car Mechanics.

Support groups for car repairs.

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

Caveman who has just invented the wheel is amazed to see a paper airplane demonstrating the principle of flight.

Psychiatrist interview an irrational number

"Before we test this, do you know how to fill out an accident report?"

I can read this audit, but HOW should I read it...What is my MOTIVATION, how do I bring these figures to life,make them sing!... Colin often wondered whether accountancy had been the right career choice for him

'You think you're better than me, don't you?'

"Well, I finally saw a shrink today."