Bike Whisperer T-Shirts

'After Fred dreamed of Linda he felt as though he'd cheated on his motorcycle.'

Braiding a Horse's Tail

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Touring Cyclist

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

A Girl and Her Horse

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

Car Dentistry.

'In her day, she did all the work for me, now I'm doing all the work for her.'

"Perhaps it was too soon for a self-driving wheel."

Support groups for car repairs.

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

Psychic Car Mechanics.

Caveman who has just invented the wheel is amazed to see a paper airplane demonstrating the principle of flight.

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

Mister Oedipus.

"Before we test this, do you know how to fill out an accident report?"

Foreigner ready for the hunt

Psychic car mechanics.

"This obsession of yours about becoming a car mechanic..."

"Don't worry Doctor. We expect your car to make a full recovery."

When did you last have your oil changed?

'You think you're better than me, don't you?'

"It's worse than I thought."

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

"Well, I finally saw a shrink today."