Car Service Professional T-Shirts

"Oh, great, the warranty is up."

Is this for wiping greasy hands?

'So, a bailout is like a Ponzi scheme for automakers?'

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

Demonic Repossession.

'I'm OK, but the car is in 'intensive care'!'

'...Plus $847.93 for replacing our front door....'

Professor Freely's new alternative fuel source did have its drawbacks.

"Nap time."

A world choked with people mindlessly on the move

"The problem is there's no engine. Just a mysterious plot device."

"Tesla's founder Elon Musk launched his spacex rocket today with a successful pinpoint return to earth. . . General motors said it would rebuild its plant and start again from scratch."

'There goes the squeak in your brakes, Mrs. Ferguson.'

"It's worse than I thought."

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

QUICK OIL CHANGE & FLU SHOT

"Often, it's sullen and withdrawn, and then, suddenly, it becomes hostile and vengeful."

"Oh...that's not good."

'I'm after a longer dipstick. This one doesn't reach the oil anymore.'

'Don't tell me to watch my language! You give me this sort of quote, I'll give you this sort of quote!'

Peak oil and the limited future of petrol cars.

"It went a little over estimate - We had to put it in intensive care fore awhile."

Your big end has gone

Whining SUV.

Amino acid. Shampoo with amino acid, I said, not battery acid.

'I have fixed your car. That other whining sound is your husband checking over my bill.'

'D.N.A. tests show that the fuel pump doesn't belong to this car.'

"When you're done here can you look at my laptop?"

Mufflers.

Road kill - Foreign competition beating US auto domination.

Mechanic: 'A grinding sound, eh? Maybe she needs a new paint job.'