Capitol Comrade Gifts

"You've been around here longer than I have. What are 'congressional ethics'?"

"Bad dog."

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

'Ah, Gripes, you want to discuss a raise with me, eh? Come in, sit down, make yourself comfortable!'

'First semester, you learn the numbers. Second semester, you use them to count the days 'til school is out.'

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

"Damn! Just as my inertia was starting to build up momentum."

'We were able to make a quick alliance together because of common insecurities.'

Knight with paint tin on his head.

'No, Mrs. Dudley! If there's a bone in a chair, that means it's reserved for Marmaduke!'

'How many times have I told you to stay out of the cemetery?'

'I hear it's a grudge match between the three of them.'

"How was I supposed to know she was allergic?"

"Talk long-term commitment to me."

That's what I call a well trained dog!!

'He spent yesterday being briefed on the threats from a cyber attack...'

"Oh, great. The boss is in one of his enigmatic, 'Guess what I'm thinking' moods again."

'Quick! 'Tushy to the ground' stance!'

'If you don't stop interrupting me with your phone calls, we're never going to finish our face to face meeting.'

'I like you, you've got balls.'

Dog, dressed as vet, is about to give cat lethal injection. Cat owner says: 'Terminal? I hope you don't mind if I get a second opinion.'

'We're like the canine unit, only tougher. Instead of dogs we use big, bad wolves.'

"There, that ought to hold you."

'HA! You are defenceless against my Churn Ray!'

"If I may say so, sire, that is ONE Magna Carta."

"Say Jeeeeeez!"

"Of course I know Jim. We once built a time machine together. We go way back."

Who has two thumbs and

"Mr Yomp is in a big hurry, so give him 'speedy runaround number 39'..."

'I see John Boehner is being sworn in and Harry Reid is sworn at.'

"...Perhaps he's detecting a ghostly presence. . !!"

Eventually, many dogs and dog owners begin to look alike

"Coal? What are you, Kringle, some kind of eco-terrorist?"