Cannibalism Humor Gifts

Cannibal's Cream of Earl Soup.

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

'10,000 years and no one's improved on the idea of meat on a stick!'

"What!?! I like a nice salad every now and then, too. What of it?"

'Health Benefits of a Vegan Diet... How the heck did this get here?'

'That was the best 'Filet Magnon' I've had in a while.'

Cemetery: Communicated with your loved one see Madam Zolta within.

"So, Claire tells me you ate her parents last night."

I don't care if you hate that word – I'm hangry.

'I told you not to order the stake.'

"Y'know what? - sod it. . . I think I'll have the grass too. . .!"

Hannibal Becomes More Conciliatory.

'I wonder if we're getting enough fibre?'

'I tell you what: Mistress' lap was so much more comfortable before she started her diet...'

Good news! We determined the hair in your vegan soup is from the chef's fake fur coat!

"Something I ate disagreed with me." "What did you eat?" "Ibuku. He disagreed with me."

'Pterodatyl? Everything tastes like Pterodatyl to you!'

'First of all, he can't live on sunflower seeds alone!'

"Brrroccollliii...brrroccollliii...I told you I was a vegetarian when we met, Dwayne, so get over it!"

"I decided to limit myself to just one Easter egg this year."

'I've worked out, if you lose ten pounds a week, in two months you'll be gone completely.'

Mother Nature's Health Foods

Naughty Food

Thanksgiving Dinners: (Turkey/Ham/Corned Beef/Children Under 5) 'They're eating their own now!'

"I'm one of those vegetarians who eat meat."

Dressing a chicken

"Remember what happens in vegans stays in vegans."

'Honey, I brought the boss home for dinner!'

It's a wonderful death

Tastes like Beeficken!

Classy joint...

'True, it is ten ninety five for all you can eat. But that does not include the thin woman inside you that's crying to get out.'

No-one had the heart to tell Lily it was just a mushroom.

'If you want to grow up big and strong, you have to eat your vegetarians.'