Canine Mischief Maker Pillows

Squeaker Trophies

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

Newt sale

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

"Pssst. Fake poop."

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

'Have you tried hitting Ctrl-Alt-Delete?'

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

It's sure been easier to mess around at work since we decided to bell the boss.

Artist gets pooped on by lots of birds.

What have you done with the spare filter paper, please? I've made you a hat miss!

Man defaces a painting to make it fit above his fireplace.

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

"I told you we should have given them treats!"

'Look out for the park ranger while Bernie and I chop us some firewood!'

Frankie the discount genie

'Grandma says she has the perfect wrestler nickname for me. What does Tiny Terror mean?'

Oh, confound it, I was in landscape mode.

"As you can see, we allowed you to bring your cell phones; however, this is hell, so even local calls will be charged as roaming."

Aircraft accidentally hits a witch.

'No pennies.'

'Norman, why is it you're the one who always gets detention.'

Tommy Cooper.

By the way, my foot's asleep. So, I guess an unscrupulous woman who wanted to play footsie with me could pretty much get away with murder right now. !

One C Battery, Two Double A's.

"Do you have any idea what you've done? There are twelve hundred bottles of cognac on that ship!"

'I don't think this is how we draw them to see who goes first.'

'Sorry about that. My dog got a hold of my voodoo doll.'