Canine Contemplator Gifts

Meditation for dogs

"Wouldn't it be fascinating if dogs could read our thoughts? Or would it be horrifying?"

"Should I get a dog?"

"Shhh - he's trying open his third nostril."

"Am I hungry?" The dog asked himself. "Yes. I am hungry."

"I bark, therefore I am."

'!!X@#!! Reincarnation!'

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

Sisyphus during Covid

Men in office, pose as Rodin's: The Thinker. A sign on the wall reads: THINK.

"Shall we put it in play?"

Differing thoughts of male and female.

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

"Helen, is it just the accountant in me, or am I sensing a tone of wistful melancholy and a bittersweet acceptance of the unfathomable mysteries of corporate life in those numbers?"

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

'You still can't take it with you, but we now offer cloud storage for intellectual properties.'

'We cut it into teensy-weensy squares.'

'I just can't keep up with the conversations in deep space.'

Caterpillar Paranoia

'What? -- I send you all this great sunlight, and you waste it growing PROTOPLASM?'

"While Covid is still our top story scientists remain focused on Earth's pending collision with Jupiter."

'We may think 2012 is over, but history books are full of things we thought were over.'

'Since the universe is rapidly expanding, there's a lot more that we have to worry about now.'

Apocalipsis

"I've taught him to do tricks, he wants you to pick a card."

"Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise."

Descartes' dog.

"This human experiment has gone on long enough. Give the hippos control."

'He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, who cares...'

Ken wandered home wondering what the lunar new year would bring. . . like every other man and his dog.

In-trays 'In' & 'Fighting'.

"Totality was great, but now that it's over I'm like, 'What am I even doing?'"