Canine Companion Contemplator Gifts

Ken wandered home wondering what the lunar new year would bring. . . like every other man and his dog.

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

Family with pets.

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

"Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi!"

"Of course, in cosmic years, we're still quite young."

"Shall we put it in play?"

"I can't believe how much I love her. Just look at those sienna eyes and that adorable little nose. I honestly don't know how I'd survive without her." "He has food."

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

'You still can't take it with you, but we now offer cloud storage for intellectual properties.'

'We cut it into teensy-weensy squares.'

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

"Shhh - he's trying open his third nostril."

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

'I just can't keep up with the conversations in deep space.'

Buffering

"Oh, and don’t forget to pick up you-know-who’s ‘woof-woof’ treats."

"While Covid is still our top story scientists remain focused on Earth's pending collision with Jupiter."

'What? -- I send you all this great sunlight, and you waste it growing PROTOPLASM?'

'We may think 2012 is over, but history books are full of things we thought were over.'

"Boy, I wish I had brought some magazines..."

'Since the universe is rapidly expanding, there's a lot more that we have to worry about now.'

"Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise."

Descartes' dog.

Apocalipsis

"This human experiment has gone on long enough. Give the hippos control."

'He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, who cares...'

"Totality was great, but now that it's over I'm like, 'What am I even doing?'"

"I bark, therefore I am."

"Do you want my opinion as an art critic or as your best friend?"

'Hey, don't look at me -- I was AGAINST free will.'

Meditation for dogs

"I wonder if there's life as we know it on other planets."