Candy Mastermind T-Shirts

'Mr. Dobbs, this organizer is for your pills, not for different colors of M & M's.'

"We're playing doctor. Do you have any old magazines for our waiting room?"

'It's some more story ideas from Francis Bacon.'

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"It's such a nice day. Why don't you go outside and plagiarize something?"

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

Who stole my candy?

Building a gingerbread house

"If a fruit doesn't have a lolly flavour, is it a real fruit?"

Implement operation 'KILL ALL PLUMBERS'!

"Mmm, processed food. Just like mom used to microwave."

'Eggs, I'm cooking eggs!'

"See - that's how he's able to write all those plays."

'Done! We're now on Santa's 'nice' list.'

'I see you plan to grow by 50 a year!'

Eager to pull a prank on his chiropractor, Dennis taped a bag of potato chips to the small of his back.

Cavity wall insulation in a gingerbread house.

Businessman's schedule full of confrontations.

"I'd love to share these with you, but I'd never forgive myself if you got tooth decay."

Manager. Managing a political campaign and a baseball team are alike in many ways. A campaign is launched with a "first pitch," when a candidate gives a speech selling himself or herself. I change pitchers based on the game situation. In politics and baseball, sometimes it's best to come from the right side and sometimes it's best to come from the left side. We study our competitors' weaknesses and exploit those. In politics we call that "opposition research." And I don't worry about the

"Hey Neil, I've got an idea - let's really freak everyone out and tell them you're quitting physics to become my new co-Pope."

"I don't know how the competition are finding out our secrets!"

'Ok cup cake looks like its time to meet your maker.'

Woman planning dinner party.

'Are you gonna answer that?'

Brainstorming!

'Jim has writer's block, which we're all grateful for.'

"Welcome to Kickstarter."

"How about this? The story of a little reindeer whose exclusion from reindeer games led to the study of math and science, enabling him to develop levitation tech and thus eliminate the need for flying reindeers, thereby consigning his early tormentors to

Kids in spooky costumes doing trick or treat

Helicopter Mom

I'm having fun, all in all. But there is one question which I attempted to answer and no matter what, I fail: Why do candy stores have business hours?

"I swear! As soon as she saw me, she jumped onto a chair and started screaming! It was hilarious..."

'Three iron.'