Candlelit Connoisseur Gifts

"This place caters to workaholics."

The ghosts of Christmas yet to come.

Hildegard von Bingen

"I'm just saying. This would be even MORE romantic if we couldn't see in the dark."

'Your night writing book, madam.'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Signs of Aging: Light headedness, shortening, waxy skin, burn out and hot flashes.

'And I love you too, darling, but there's the lust to think of.'

"Darling, you never let me see the side of you that pays."

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

At a secluded, candle-lit dinner, love rears its ugly head.

'You know what would be really romantic? If, just for once, you sat at the tap end.'

The Fuse

Man frozen in portrait pose.

'It's my latest novel, 'Hard Times' part 2.'

Moliere

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

Suddenly it occurred to Justin that rose petals might have been more romantic.

Candle Moment

Nocturne

'Been biting drunken bitches again, have we?'

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

Charles Dickens.

'With our romantic candlelight dinner, I'm obligated to include a safe-sex warning.'

C Day Lewis.

Bleak House

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

'I thought I'd cut out the middle men.'

'There's nothing romantic about not being able to mend a fuse at your age!'

'There's nothing more romantic than candle light when it hides the dirty dishes.'

'I called the electric company and told them not to hurry to restore power.'

"Lost all track fo time with you. 93 unread messages!"

Valentine's Day calls for a romantic candlelight dinner and soft music. Then a trip back to my place for some heavy groping and groaning.

'Shhhhh...He's preparing for the holiday season.'

' Well..She did it to me again.'