Cancer Awareness Champion Pillows

"Our war is against cancer."

"This isn't helping my migraine."

"It's time I got a bigger sword!"

'Your blood Sugar is very high.'

Say balls to testicular cancer, remember to check your crown jewels regularly.

Getting to the ER saved my life...early retirement.

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

'You're not retaining water. You're retaining cookies and ice cream and pizza...'

Female chemotherapy warrior.

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'

'Must you always point out my floss?'

Bubbling

'Nurse! With this chemo cocktail, get me some mixed nuts and pretzels!'

Flo discovered that one perk of cancer is that people treat her like a queen.

"In some ways it'll be a relief when the obesity time-bomb does finally go off."

"Good news, Mrs. Bryant - I think we got it all."

'I said my hormones are playing up again! Why don't you pay attention?'

"I must be getting old, my feet hurt even before I get out of bed in the morning!"

AIDS prevention

'No thanks, I recently gave them up.'

"The Hendersons say they've got Covid. Is that still a thing?"

"I'm healthy. It's the wealthy and wise part that's been a challenge."

'Are you willing to release your medical records?'

'There's already an aids quilt... the committee thought it would be a good idea if the club made a syphilis quilt.'

Prostate Issues

"Oooh, no - I couldn't have another slice of carrot cake, Mabel - not with my irritable bowel the way it is..."

'The bad news is that it's definitely Cancer. The good news is that I hear it's 'in'.'

Drug-Free Zone ... Except For Junk Food.

Should have used a higher SPF...

'By the time we grow up we'll have complete equality with men...Ulcers, high blood pressure,heart attacks...'