Campus Comic Enthusiast Gifts

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

'Hmph. College kids.'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

Billy. The Kid.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

'It's called 'cause and effect.' I pound this log and Tarzan goes bananas.'

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

'So what are you studying, young man?'

Spiro & Pusho and the Scavenger.

'Well, Scout Smith, escort the little old lay across the street.'

"The doctor will be with you two in a second. As for you, I'd recommend a motivational speaker."

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"Don't tell me, first time away from home, right?"

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

Their relationship was doomed to fail. She was frigid, and his arms were too short to rub one out.

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'