Campus Gifts

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

Continuing education.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

"One year closer to college!"

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

Math Major Pennants. ISOSCELES. SCALENE EQUILATERAL.

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'I'm supposed to take a geography test and I can't find the right room!'

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

"Oh, this old thing?"

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

Congratulations! All that cramming paid off.

"Someday, Sweetheart, you’ll look back on this day and think to yourself, ‘Covid ruined my college experience.’"

"Don't tell me, first time away from home, right?"

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

"The Wi-Fi password is publish 'publish or perish'."

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

Our college is tuned to the students' every need! Campus Visits. We have body image awareness week. Safe sex awareness week. Bullying, drug use and tolerance awareness weeks. What did I miss? Welcome. History, math or English awareness week? Great idea. I'll suggest that.

University Cafeteria. The first semester of college is tough. I'm not taking geography because I couldn't find the classroom on the map. I'm way behind on my archeology assignments. I'm buried and need to dig my way out. And everybody in political science lies and cheats to get ahead. How are you doing in statistics? I think I'm doing very well! My test scores are hugely below the class median. I should probably learn what that means.

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

Trust

'You have failed on all counts...'

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

The Giamatti era

Treadway college - A little knowledge, a lot of tuition.

"If we learned anything in law school, we learned that you can never have enough wiggle room."

'Does it matter what answer I put down? After all, this is Liberal Arts.'

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

'I wanted to ask you about life-experience credit.'