Campus Cruiser Gifts

'University tenure, now there's a sweet gig.'

Mr. Punch in Venice

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

"The Wi-Fi password is publish 'publish or perish'."

'It's St Patrick's Day...I thought you called this car your lucky charm??!'

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

"Balance is essential, Ray. For example, this week, my life is purpost-driven, and I'll follow that with seven days of aimless drifting!"

Spinner luggage is fast becoming the city walker's, walking companion of choice. There's no stopping, no mess, nor butt sniffing, with the added bonus that it comes with you when you go on holidays. . ."

"I'm looking for a car with backseat performance."

"I'd rather be at the office."

'I've never eaten here. I come for the broadband.'

Bargeman on a canal boat.

Fighting Gondoliers.

'I realize you love my boat, but you've been on it for nearly a month now. Do me a favor and go home.'

"Over the river and through a ridiculous detour that has us in the middle of who-knows-where, to Grandfather’s house we go!"

Playboy has rigged his car with a loveseat

'My wife insisted I stop and ask someone for directions. Could you just pretend you're giving them to me?'

Sports car.

Now Entering Wyoming (or one of those other rectangular states that are out west someplace).

Mount Rushmore waves back to tourists.

Somewhere In France...The Watsons have just discovered that English is not the universal language after all.

Slow, merge left, resume speed, stop, stay, sit, roll over, good boy!

'It's very nice, but it's not really me. Do you have any of those little round, hollow, plastic balls?'

"It's for you - it's my lawyer."

"We didn't know you had a rush hour."

'Good news... I got the venue changed to Florida.'

Ignore him he's just showing off

'I didn't always want to be a gondolier. My first love was the Church.'

"Whoops! We have pot holes here, too."

'Top dog or not, you gotta slow down.'

"Amsterdam? Boy, am I lost!"