Calendar Forgetter Pillows

'What do you mean it was last night?! Let me see the tickets!'

"Ok weekend! I hope you can make up for that awful week!"

I hate Mondays and now I'm developing an aversion to Tuesdays!

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

'They were going to get married when they were young, but he kept forgetting the wedding date!'

Pregnancy Test

"Here's a blues number written about my inability to remember computer passwords."

"One of our old servers has been hacked. Maybe whoever did it will give me my password."

"You don't seem to know your lines." "That's because I'm an understudy."

"Does my transfer include my cubicle? I have all my passwords written on its walls."

"Ever since I changed Siri to a male he's been forgetting birthdays and anniversaries."

"Follow up appointment... the doctor will be retired by then."

2020

'How do you expect me to remember. . . when every year you look younger?'

"Can't do 3 p.m. — I'm scheduled for a migraine."

"Birthday? No? Anniversary?

"Have you noticed, after Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF?"

"Anniversary? No? Birthday?"

I add 1,000 steps every day just going back to my car to get the mask I was supposed to put on."

Easter Bunny HQ. United States. If all these states can move up their primaries, why can't I move Easter ahead of Valentine's Day?!

'I gave you life and you forget my birthday.'

'That reminds me must buy an anniversary present for Lady Caroline!!'

"You think your job is hard? I have to remember which date Easter falls on each year."

'Time management begins with the assumption that time will move slow enough to be managed.'

"Sorry I left the keys in the car, now it's gone!"

Happy New Year!

'Can't you find another date? The evening of the 24th of December is pretty much the only night I'm not free...'

Tony 'Scareface' Montana's Wife.

"It's definitely Friday. I'm looking at my calendar."

How to talk to a mathematically untalented boss.

'Sorry, Ted, but I don't think I can squeeze you in...'

"I forgot my phone."

'Noah completely forgot the fish.'

'He drinks to forget and today it's our wedding anniversary.'