Calendar Hater Pillows

"You know I hate birthdays!"

"It's a leap year, so an extra week's added to the calendar."

"It's definitely Friday. I'm looking at my calendar."

'And that's your idea of a desk calendar...'

'Look - forget I asked if you were free any evenings...'

Time Passes...For Meaning.

"It's from our 'Time Management' trainer. He's double booked and can't come!"

"It's my New Year!"

March madness

'Make appointments for all the people I don't like using the Mayan calendar.'

"Have you noticed, after Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF?"

'And why do you want a refund on that calendar?'

Every Dog Has His Day

Next years calendar.

Current Events.

'This is the only time I really get to seize the day.'

"Wait, it's Thursday? I thought it was Tuesday! The first day of the rest of my life was supposed to be Wednesday!!"

"Since I don't really know you, I got you something that's easy to regift."

The Month of November

My New Year's resolution? To no longer suffer in silence. I will moan, whimper, and complain until you resolve to get the heater fixed.

Scrooge: only-23-days until day after Christmas.

'For my 40th he took me to a restaurant where they sing happy birthday to you, so I divorced him.'

"One in four fleas is a leap flea."

'When I say 'February' what do you think of? . . . I was hoping for 'Valentine's Day', but I guess that was a long shot.'

'It's always April 15th here.'

Photocopying a chippendale calender - "She's running our of muscle toner."

'I mean...how do I know it's really your birthday?'

Kevin's Eleven-Thousandth Day of Being Kevin

"March 177th? Already?!"

"It's not that I can't stand the cold - I just hate the holidays."